Anxiety
by Alterius
Summary: Lou Fa might never fully conquer her anxiety, but there's one person that can at least quiet it.


**A/N:** Between frustration at the lack of wlw content in the fandom and the prompt my boyfriend gave me to keep both of us writing, here is a short LenaLou drabble I wrote a couple weeks ago. I hope you enjoy reading and think the ship is as cute as I do. The prompt for this one was, "What was that for?"

 **Disclaimer:** I don't own DGM, obviously.

* * *

When Lenalee returns to the Order covered in fresh bumps and bruises, she still does so with a brilliant smile. Despite the deep cuts and scratches that need to be tended to, she still makes time to wave at passersby. It's a sight that has a smile creeping onto Lou Fa's own face as she peeks around the corner.

She waits patiently at the end of the hall, along the sides where she catches the attention of only a handful of people, unlike Lenalee Lee who has all eyes on her. A single person greets Lou Fa in passing, but everyone offers Lenalee at least a hello as they walk past her to their destination.

Lou Fa feels _invisible_ , standing there with chapped hands that curl around the bottom of her lab coat, fingers pulling at the frayed edges and loose strings. _Her_ uniform—unlike the clean, well kept and _cute_ one that Lenalee wore—suffered under the hold of Lou Fa's anxiety.

For a moment, a flash of fear rocks through fragile bones and her hold on the bottom of a her lab coat tightens. _What if_ , she thinks, _Lenalee overlooks me?_ Her imagination runs wild, conjuring up an image of beautiful, amethyst eyes glancing past her like they would a ghost and her heart clenches painfully at the thought.

But nothing of the sort happens. Instead when their eyes meet, Lou Fa's heart skips a beat in her chest as she watches Lenalee's smile brighten with a familiar, brilliant glow that Lou Fa had found herself able to bask in more often as of late.

Her cheeks color, flushing an impossible shade of red as she _bounds_ over with a skip in her step that Lou Fa is unused to. Nobody has ever greeted her with such an enthusiasm. No one has ever lit up like the early morning sun at the sight of her.

"Lou Fa!" she says with that whimsical, soft, _beautiful_ voices that makes Lou Fa weak at the knees. With fingers trembling as much as her knees are quaking, she plucks the glasses from her face to clean the lenses with the end of her shirt as an obvious ploy to avoid making eye contact. Looking Lenalee Lee in the eye was an impossible task that someone like her couldn't manage. She was strong and smart, beautiful and compassionate. _Anyone_ would want to be _with_ her and _many_ deserved it more than Lou Fa.

"M-Miss Lee!"

There's a stutter in her voice, but Lenalee shows no signs of noticing, makes no attempt to correct her bungled attempt at speech. "How— How was your missive? _M-Mission_! I meant mission!"

" _Long_ ," she says with a sigh that hangs heavy on Lou Fa's heart. There's exhaustion evident in her face and more than pity, Lou Fa feels _admiration_ for the passion that drives Lenalee to protect her loved ones. She wears those scars with pride and they do nothing to take away from her charm and natural allure.

"I missed—"

Lou Fa's heart soars, hoping with every ounce of her being that she knows the next word that would come out of her mouth.

"—everyone."

And as quickly as her heart had grown wings, they break and it comes crashing back down to earth. Dark eyes turn downcast as he pushes her glasses back onto her nose, saying a silent prayer that Lenalee will mistake her dismay for a want to retrieve her ability to _see_ past the length of her nose.

But Lenalee is no fool. She can read people better than Lou Fa would ever _want_ to.

"Is everything alright?" Lenalee asks before Lou Fa can derail the conversation from the constant fear stirring in her gut, reminding her that they were dozens of other people superior to her in ways she wasn't able to count.

It only took one thought to launch herself into a downward spiral. Within seconds, she's gone from a mere comparison to downright _demeaning_ herself with a barrage of insults that could be a weapon against even the strongest of warriors. The longer she thought about it, the more evident it became that Lenalee was out of her league. No matter how Lou Fa wanted... _this_ to continue, it was obvious: Lenalee would, inevitably, find someone better.

… Wouldn't she?

As if sensing her negativity, a dazzling smile spreads across Lenalee's face that Lou Fa only _wishes_ would scare away the way she felt about herself. Right there, in the hallway, amidst all the others coming and going, hands strong and smooth reach down to take her own.

There's no hint—not even the slightest implication—that the rough texture of Lou Fa's hands bothers Lenalee. The firm grip on her hands is unfamiliar, but the warmth that fills Lou Fa in response is one she's getting used to.

Lenalee leans down, surprising Lou Fa with a kiss from soft lips that press gentle against her own chapped ones. The heat that filled her chest spreads to her face and remains even when Lenalee pulls away after a few brief seconds that are too short for either of them.

The smile on Lenalee's face doesn't drop nor do the fingers intertwined with her own and when Lou Fa at last gathers the courage to speak, she struggles to keep her voice steady and to stop her nerves from leaking out as stutters.

"What— What was that for?"

"I missed everyone, but I missed you most of all."


End file.
